From the Old Bucket List: “Do a Spider-man kiss with a female, preferably while raining.”

Updated: Sunday, April 10, 2016.

If you’re friends with me on Facebook, you probably didn’t even notice that I deleted my Bucket List. It’s not like you’re a bad friend — I would never suggest that — but Facebook has done everything it can to phase out the Notes app other than, well, phasing out the Notes app.

Just as Thomas Jefferson said, “The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants,” so also must one’s Bucket List, especially as you transition from a lonely, nomadic twenty-something obsessed with TV and film memes — I honestly though that, before I die, I needed to hide in a barrel from someone pursuing me! — to a thirty-something adult with responsibilities.

There are two things in common between those two dudes with bucket lists — I am still going to die some day, and there are still plenty of things that I want to do before I do. Here’s the new (and improved?) bucket list:

[ ] Get a second tattoo.
[ ] Send out a Christmas card with a photograph of my family.
[ ] Make an ant hill casting.
[ ] Attend a Dallas Stars playoff game.
[ ] Order the Creature Feature at Stella’s Lounge each month I live at Half Century.
[ ] Use a bicycle as my primary mode of transportation.
[ ] Learn to ride a motorcycle.
[ ] Visit a net zero community.
[ ] Become an expert at driving a manual transmission automobile.
[ ] Brew a batch of ginger ale.
[ ] Attend a Renaissance Festival.
[ ] Eat a giant roasted turkey leg.
[ ] Attend an Of Montreal concert without leaving early.
[ ] Become proficient at skiing.
[ ] Read Herman Melville’s Moby Dick.
[ ] Eat barbecue in Kansas City.
[ ] Conduct an EVP experiment.
[ ] Visit all 50 states.
[ ] Acquire a “Spocked Fiver.”
[ ] Go scuba diving.
[ ] Compete on a game show.
[ ] Use Aeris’ ultimate weapon and limit break in Final Fantasy VII.
[ ] Write and record a solo album.

As with the original, I am going to update this as the muse strikes me. (Does a muse strike? Or possess? Or what? What do muses do?) Furthermore, I abide by the rule of “pictures or it didn’t happen,” so this post will slowly get more and more visual as I knock ’em down.

UPDATE, Monday, January 11, 2016: Because of the death of David Bowie on Sunday, January 10, 2016, I removed “[ ] See David Bowie live” from the Bucket List.